I am not talking about my immediate family i.e. husband and four children but other (so called) family members here.
I had the wind taken from my sails last week – I found some nasty things written about me on an Internet blog. There is an old saying that goes something like “you can think it, but you cant say it”, oh I don’t know the saying but you get the gist. Well this was written, and it shocked me at the desperate measures some people would go to to try damage my family, and my reputation of being a good mother and wife. Well it didn’t work – sure I was hurt, and to be perfectly honest I was devastated that such things could be said about me.
That person wont win, never, ever – I will always be better than she. I guess I don’t have to live with her, and that I am thankful of. Those writings which I discovered led to a family dispute which ended up in me questioning the last 37 years of my life. With both my natural parents dead now – the people I thought loved me, I have discovered don’t – turns out everything was a charade. Past 30 odd years of believing gone because people took sides, rather than facing up to a few days of disharmony and discussions.
My children are devastated. I broke the news to my eldest this week he knew something was wrong so we decided not to lie to him, and my second eldest came to realise things were not right either. Tears shed, young fragile spirits broken and sadly they got their first taste of real hurt – I ache for them.